The thing I most regret about my fiction-writing days was the terrible way in which I described things. Now that I'm older and two years past writing, it's hit me as to why I like slash so much. It's not the sex, God forbid, although admittedly I do like lemons a lot more now, when there's very little of it and/or it's very hot, with minimal descriptions of throbbing veiny members and the like. Those always make me throw up. No, it's the kissing, and the awkwardness and sometimes just how natural the relationship is. It's... I can't explain it, but there's this huge difference between the way I write and the way that others write. Their's is so fluid and descriptive and leaves readers filling in the blanks, but those are like tiny little pinpricks of blanks. Me, my writing is very scientific, explaining everything down to nitty gritty detail; why they went to the garden, why so and so has red hair. It's not necessary, it really isn't.

And man, I really do hate myself for falling into one of the common traps fiction-writing fangirls fall into. Complete and blatant idolizing. The thing I find more attractive about characters is when they're written with all their faults, and I don't mean swearing and death and darkness and gloom, 'cuz that's all behind me now. I mean the kissing, romantic scenes, where the author reminds us that yes, these are the characters we know and love and place on a pedestal above everyone else, but these characters aren't gods. Their mouths don't fit perfectly, they're awkwardly clumsy, they don't all taste of sugar and cinnamon, they cut their tongues on their partner's braces and wind up with the stray bits of rice from sushi trapped there in their mouths. They're human. And like, it's not like I have yards of experience from giving tongue (cuz, I mean, ew), but I'd imagine it to not taste of strawberries and chocolate and whatever else is sweet. I'd imagine it to be wet and breathy and not to be clean and perfect; whoever heard of a clean, dry tonguefuck? I love stories where they keep it real (well, as real as slash fanfiction can get) and the characters taste of toothpaste or cheese or the tangy flavor you get in your mouth late at night before brushing your teeth. I love it when characters' thoughts aren't perfectly intelligible (with perhaps the exception of Tim Drake/Bruce, 'cuz yeah, I agree with the writers; they're complete freaks)-- I mean, what person who has ever been kissed by someone they didn't know liked them kissed back while thinking, Goodness, this is interesting, when did this happen? But then again, maybe I should have noticed before. It really was glaringly obvious. It's more like, what, shit, God, just complete incoherency. (Incidentally... there are two fantastic Tim/Kon stories that I love, both by different writers but with similar plotlines-- Tim dresses up and they both somehow end up shagging. Kon's mental reaction just blows my mind. It's so perfect.)

Another thing I like (and this is where I fell straight into my science-girl-writer trench) is when writers do their research properly. Batman/Nightwing slash: Batman goes to fight Poison Ivy, tells Nightwing to look out for a certain plant, calls it by its scientific name. Nightwing, he just calls it a big venus flytrap. Robin on the other hand? Definitely scientific name. The thing that really irks me is when people write and unconsciously portray the characters with expertise as rookies. Batman looks at guano, he says it's guano. He doesn't say bat droppings. Thankfully I never fell into this trap (I always over-scienced it); it really helps to define a character. Use a scientific name, contrast him with the character with the one using casual lingo. One's more professional, the other's more carefree. This doesn't have any relation with slash anymore but I really don't care.

It's been two days of my trying to start my Psychology homework. So far I have three lines. It's an impressive amount of work, as anyone who's ever seen me try and fight my willpower will know. The fanfiction screams my name.

edit: One other thing I like about slashfic is when the characters completely lose their inhibitions. It's a pervy thing, but I hate hate hate those where the one character is wide-eyed and scared and pushing the other guy away. Because it's not romantic anymore, it's like rape.

Gotta commend these writers on keeping their characters pretty IC. Wally is so impulsive it's cute and Bruce is so grim and broodish it's... cute. XD